Wendy graduated Summa Cum Laude
with a Bachelors of Science in Business
Management. She was in the 97th
percentile for the preceding 5 years on
the LSAT and graduated in the top 22%
of her law school class. During law school
Wendy received several awards and
recognitions including, Complete Bio
From Utah Bar Magazine.
THE 10 COMMANDMENTS
The real reason that we can't have the Ten
Commandments posted in a courthouse or Congress is this . . .
you cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' 'Thou
Shalt Not Commit Adultery' and 'Thou Shall Not
Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and
politicians. I mean come on people think about it ....
it creates a hostile work environment.
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
A lawyer is in line at the pearly gates when someone wearing a long black federal judge robe strides past the line and goes right in.
"Hey," says the lawyer, "He can't cut the line just because he's a federal judge!"
St. Peter replies: "Shhh, that's God, He just thinks he's a federal judge."
Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? The old drunk, of course, the other three are mythological creatures.
An attorney was sitting in his office late one night, when Satan appeared before him. The Devil told the lawyer, "I have a proposition for you. You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange is your soul, your wife's soul, your children's souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and parents in law, and the souls of all your friends and law partners." The lawyer thought about this for a moment, then asked, "So, what's the catch?"
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?
A doberman pinscher.
More from the witness stand
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the circus was in town, I'm going with male.
A prominent young attorney was on his way to court to begin arguments on a complex lawsuit when he suddenly found himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter started to escort him inside, when he began to protest that his untimely death had to be some sort of mistake.
"I'm much too young to die! I'm only 35!" St. Peter agreed that 35 did seem to be a bit young to be entering the pearly gates, and agreed to check on his case. When St. Peter returned, he told the attorney, "I'm afraid that the mistake must be yours, my son. We verified your age on the basis of the number of hours you've billed to your clients, and you're at least 108."
